I am tired of politicians playing around with my future

Talking to my parents about this brings pain to them. They blame themselves for the decision they took back in 1998. I was 9 years old, and they decided to bring me to the United States of America, the land of the free, opportunity and under its Constitution everyone is created equal.

I am not free. My opportunities have been taken away. I was not
created equal simply because I do not have a 9-digit number that allows me to be human; I am classified as an “alien” not just an alien, but an illegal alien. I will not refer to myself as an alien, I am American; an American that loves the red, white and blue. I am an American that would die for this country, yet I am not allowed to do so.

My parents have taught me my native language along with the culture, yet I find myself being corrected over and over again because I said it wrong or picked the wrong word. I question if my academic success will ever be good enough. I question if my hard work and dedication will ever pay off. I question what citizenship feels like. What does citizenship feel like?

I am angry at the fact that some of my friends and relatives don’t vote, they take that right for granted. I am angry that I cannot do a simple drug test because my identification card is not good enough. I am angry that I cannot drive, and I refuse to drive without a driver’s license. I am angry that I have better spelling and grammar than many of my natural born citizens. I am angry that they come to me to correct their papers. I am angry that I am angry at them because I love them.

I am angry that many people think it is easy to get a visa or “citizenship card”… there is no such thing as a “citizenship card.” I am angry that the same people tell me to just get a social security number. I am angry that my father HAS a social security number, yet he is an “illegal alien” like me. I am angry that my father cannot get his retirement money because of his status in this country. I am angry because we don’t know where his retirement money will go, 38 years of his hard work. I am angry because people assume we do not pay taxes. Yes we do, my mother and I both have ITNs, Individual Taxpayer Numbers. I am angry that my family did not qualify for President’s Obama stimulus checks; we got a letter stating that one or two of the numbers filling taxes are not valid social security numbers.

I am angry because I cannot get a credit card or loans; I know I would have a great credit score. I am angry that one of my options to legalize my status is by marriage. I refuse to think or make my marriage a contract of interest rather than a life commitment with a special someone. I am angry that I cannot travel, even within the United States because I run the risk of being detained and deportation. I am tired of always being scared, I should not be scared in the land of freedom where everyone is created equal.

I am angry that people see me and tell me I smell like tacos; I do not smell like tacos I smell like my shampoo. It is embarrassing to be told, “oh sorry, I have never seen this type of ID before, let me check with my manager to see if we can accept it” when getting a drink at a restaurant or bar. I rather not drink, my matricula says what I am. I am angry that I see so many natural born citizens wasting their lives on drugs, gangs, and not doing anything with their lives. I wish they could just give me their 9-digits.

I am angry that at 22 years of age I cannot be as successful as many of my friends. I am angry that I cannot finish my undergrad in Music Education. I am angry that I only have 3 semesters left, but because I cannot apply for financial aid, I am not allowed to go back to school. I am angry that my dream school made me less because I do not have a 9-digit number. I am angry that most of my friends are now teachers, while I sit at home with an unfinished degree. I am happy their dreams became a reality. I feel like a failure. I am ashamed to even be around them; I feel like I do not belong in their world of college graduates. I am not part of their society any more. I am angry that I get frustrated and cry over this, the crying is becoming a daily habit.

I am frustrated because I know I am a great asset to this country, yet I am not allowed to play my role. I am tired of politicians playing around with my future. I am tired of their demagoguery.

I will keep DREAMing, till the end.

Have you done your part to help pass the DREAM Act? Help us by calling the target senators today!

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JB says:

ugly immigration system? It is more supportive than 99% of the countries in this world.

You all should feel lucky you are not in jail. It is a jailable offense what you did. If you went into any other country illegally, you would be in jail.

LEAVE. Please just go away. We don’t want you.

And you do drain more than you give. We just got a bill for 35 million for illegals. And some of you are getting welfare.

GO AWAY. I don’t care what skin color you are, what nationality you are. GO AWAY. Everyone will be much happier.

JB says:

LEAVE. You don’t belong here. And don’t blame the United State, blame your parents.

wahhhh, I can’t do this and that. Move back to where you came from. You were born there, hence you have citizenship.

And I repeat, blame your parents for putting you in this situation!! It was their decision.

But I am sure you won’t because people like you and your parents never take repsonsibility for the decisions they make. It is always someone else’s fault.

ireri says:

believe me when i say that this crying daily thing is not something you are alone in doing. Whether it is frustration, anger, sadness… it just comes. we have to find a way to hold both our friends and this government accountable to us and to everyone being hurt by this ugly immigration system.

Perla says:

And it hurts to say that everything here is true and it makes me cry…
Its hard to try to explain to someone why your not attending that University its hard to see everyone going to college…I pray to god that this comes true and that the next time i cry its because i am able to say “mami y papi hoy voy hacer lo que nunca avia podido hacer…”